Friday, April 13, 2012

FORGETTING


My agent friend said, "Ooo, I had a senior moment!"

I laughed appropriately, but I didn't feel like laughing. This friend was more or less my age. We were having a mile-a-minute conversation about books, trends, publishers -- dropping names, numbers -- how much so-and-so was paid for such-and-such a book, and the virtues of publishing my books as e-books.

I wanted to get out of his office, get back to my house, my place, my world, where I don't deal with "senior" anything.

When I lose a name, I say -- whatshername -- and just breeze on. When I was talking to another friend (quite some time ago, but I remember the conversation), I couldn't remember the name of the tiny machine you carry if you're an accountant -- "calculator."

That was the day I started a file called "Verbee," and began putting down words and names I forgot.

I've had trouble remembered Robin Williams' name, Anthony Hopkins' and actor Len Cariou's. "Paparazzi" comes and goes ... Also: "boeuf bourguignon, poinsettia, c'mon, and dilemma.

I'm not going to type out all the words on the Verbee list -- like "paraplegic" (typing it just now, I had to check the spelling twice).

And spelling -- I lose the ability to choose between lose (loose), choose (chose). My blog coach Fran has to proofread each blog I write, because I often misspell words, even common ordinary ones.

And computer processes -- two months ago I could open the "GARAGE BAND" program on our Mac computer -- we used it for the sound effects last year, when we did a staged reading of my play "Shattering Panes." Yesterday ... duh ... I forgot how to open, retrieve and use Garage Band so I could record John Cullum reading the first chapters of each of my six novels.

Okay -- but on THIS computer, my pal, my friend whom I meet with every day and use as my writing tool -- I certainly haven't forgotten any processes. I can do anything and everything I need to do, and MORE.

So, are my lapses -- spelling, names, words -- memory lapses? Or are they OVERLOAD?

Reality: My computer situation is seriously, confusingly complicated -- two new machines plus the three computers I'm using -- I'm running back-and-forth, doing this-and-that on five different operating systems. Plus I'm writing four blog-posts each week -- each with a different subject, different research.

Golly, all that, plus the barrage of the latest polls, the latest political attacks, wrong-doings, potential international issues, the very latest news, the nonstop ads -- all the stuff I'm being sold, or told is different, is better, while I'm simultaneously warned that it's dangerous, "beware," "do not use."

Dr. Em says: "Forgetting is not something you ought to be regretting."

I'm thinking that NOT REMEMBERING, is my brain, my body, maintaining its equilibrium.

Albert Einstein said:
“It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has exceeded our humanity.”

6 comments:

Kaye Francis said...

Particularly sensitive subject matter here for me today.
* * *
"I have forgotten more that what I ever learned in the first place." ~ I'm not sure that is the exact truth or just the feeling I often have.
* * *
Often, my semblance of spelling ~ poof, gone!
Often, my mind goes totally blank for a moment here or there = g-ma brain freeze.
Oh, the times where the brain doesn't go blank but upon the laughter, sometimes 'look' from others, when it is pointed out I used 'this' word which was far and away from the 'that' word I was thinking I'd said.
* * *
Yes, some is 'OVERLOAD' as you have said, some is 'natural aging' & some is directly the aftermath of recovering from some serious medical/brain related events, I have come through. It seems "I'm always reaching for my grasping." or something like that.
* * *
My life is also seriously uncomplicated in comparison to yours Ms. EM. You never fail to awe me in every aspect of all your do, all you know, all you share with us. I'll just be the one to constantly remind you, that I see and I appreciate your 'AMAZING'.
* * *
Dr. Em says: "Forgetting is not something you ought to be regretting." <--- I only add to this the other eff word ~ be forgiving or be gentle with yourself for what lapses there may be, and continue forth.
* * *
Much love to you Ms. EM, your John Cullum and FAMILY. I'm @grammakaye on twitter.

Anonymous said...

I think forgetting stuff is the natural process of aging. When I forget something I spend all day trying to remember it until I do. When we were growing up we didn't know what things were or called, now we can't remember what they are called and it means we are getting senile. Lots of people do it so we are not alone. I think it is OK to forget sometimes-it sharpens our minds to focus and remember.... kam

Carola said...

Your computer achievements are impressive! I forget a lot of people and things. I've learned to memorize things with an extra context--a clue so to speak, so that when I try to remember, I may remember the color, or the moment in history (good for remembering numbers) or other clue that I associated with the memory.

Linda Phillips said...

Oy vay! I used to have the most amazing memory. In my acting days, I could read a script twice and would have memorized the ENTIRE script...not just my lines.

My long term memory for trivia is still quite phenomenal, but my short term memory is..well...scary...its so bad. I have made tea in the microwave with NO WATER...spent an hour looking for a sock that is ON MY FOOT and any number of other laughable things.

These days, I rush to write down a thought, especially if it is a multiple thought...my max for remembering multiple things is 2...so if I have 3 things to remember, I had better get it written down FAST!

Oh and names...I have the worst time remembering actors names. Names that are so common to me, just elude me. I may stop the movie and look up the name online, or else I can spend the entire movie distracted by what his/her name is.

I suppose it is normal, but at times it really scares me. I mean I will be about to take my vitamins and forget what they are called...I know its with a "V"... vegetables? Its not funny!

kané said...

I see no problems in starting to forget things. The problem is no longer ours, but those who live beside us. I guess that's life. I liked the article!
@kane_sp

Anonymous said...

Outstanding thoughts on 'forgetting' and 'forgetting not'. Love and hugs, H.xxxooo

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