DEPRESSION

Can depression be cured? Can it be treated and helped by therapy?

The heavy, negative feelings that defeat energy and hope -- that make the cup of everything in your life seem empty, not full -- that logical, too clear sense that you are stuck, unable to extricate yourself from failure and the blackness, the weight and gravity of the fact that you are doomed -- that is DEPRESSION.

Hey, there's new medical news: There might be a gene for DEPRESSION. DNA provides clues to understanding stuff like DEPRESSION. Your genes aren't destiny. Researchers report that one particular gene may increase the risk of the D-Cup-Is-Empty state of mind, but -- cheer up, you depressive guys -- the gene gets nasty only in combination with an added, non-genetic factor -- a stressful, lousy, life event.

Thus and therefore, the researchers conclude that people with one form, one nasty form of a protein that ferries serotonin (the famous mood-related neurotransmitter), are prone to DEPRESSION when something traumatic happens -- for instance, if you've been diagnosed with a medical illness, or if you're a victim of childhood abuse.

If you've got the nasty, harmful gene, it prevents nerve cells in your brain from reabsorbing serotonin, and that is what leads to those feelings of sadness, that negative doomed mood, and makes it very hard for you to recover emotionally from a crisis, and get out of the deadly doldrums.

Don't start cheering just yet. Yes, new medical news confirms that you need Serotonin when you're stressed, (some doctors questioned that). The new news says maybe, possibly, perhaps, this can be fixed by Epigeneticists working on the "Epi" (upper part of a gene). You can start cheering when gene fixers announce a pill that'll fix the nasty protein -- get it back to ferrying serotonin.

I hope they hurry up and do it soon. Before the Repubs get seriously down and dirty on destroying Obama Health Care.

WHAT'S HAPPENING IN THE WORLD

John Cullum and his worried wife, Emily Frankel, talk about current news -- what's happening in Egypt, and the White House.

Though John's thoughts, and comments are practical, and realistic, what he says doesn't give Emily much comfort.

"FRIENDS" MATT LEBLANC AUDTIONS TO PLAY HIMSELF

Would-be actors, attention!

I am married to a well-known actor, who has sometimes been called "the legendary John Cullum." Okay -- he's been around a long time and he is an extraordinarily good actor. as well as a Musical Theater Star.

Many people who saw him a long time ago, in "Camelot, "On a Clear Day," "Shenandoah," "On the Twentieth Century," (and very recently in "Scottsboro Boys"), mention him as their most favorite performer.

I loved Matt LeBlanc as "Joey" in the television show "Friends" -- loved all the actors who were in that show. Each time I see a re-run of "Friends," I fall in love with the six performers all over again.

But Matt ... well, he was sexy, funny, charming, and unpredictably amazing. I watched him in the other shows he starred in after "Friends," but only for a while. Those shows didn't work. Sometimes it seemed as if the supporting actors and actresses just weren't interesting. When Matt was on the camera, (onstage), he was fun, but when he wasn't on, the shows got boring. .

Now Matt's in a new show on Sunday nights, called "Episodes." The ads summarize it saying -- "A married writing duo sells its U.K. sitcom to Hollywood and finds the price of success is Matt LeBlanc. The "Friends" star, foisted on the creators, plays himself as a demanding but savvy he-diva in Showtimes witty satire about lies, damned lies and TV."

I am not sure "Episodes" works. I got restless, even when Matt was on camera -- somehow he seemed restrained, but ... well, I'll watch again.

This film clip made me laugh and cry, thinking of the auditions that my legendary actor husband goes to when the directors and producer love him, but he isn't what they have in mind for the role of a granddaddy, a dying father, a great grandfather who's got Alzheimer's. In the past few years, very often those are roles my husband is asked to read for.

Here's Matt, and it's funny, funny sad, and true, watching him to audition to play himself.

AWARD SHOWS

I don't watch award shows.

"You won't watch the awards tonight?" Our friends ask, when I turn down their invitations to come to their after-the-awards-show parties.

"No, it depresses me!" I blithely explain.

I avoid the Academy Awards. the Tony Awards, SAG Awards, Golden Globes, Grammys, Emmys, People's Choice Awards, also the MTV Video Music Awards, Country Music Awards and the Clio Awards for commercials.

"You're a weird one, Julie Jordan ... " I sing the song from "Carousel," telling myself I'm worse than the "queer one" as per the lyrics.

JC laughs, but understands. It's not just the glamorous names, fabulous clothes, red carpet, and memories of us sitting in limos, waiting in a limo line until our limo was told to pull up. It was depressing when we emerged, and the various TV announcers called out John Cullum's name, and I observed fans staring at me, shrugging, turning away because I was not somebody.

It's even worse, being at the ceremony, sitting in special aisle seats in case JC's got to rush to the stage. And nowadays, watching the show on television, my feelings for the winners and the losers make me intensely aware of me in my performer days.

I find myself wondering what I could do to get more attention -- be better known, be more famous, and that is NOT good -- it's wrong, distracting-- instead of doing the work of my work, my mind is on what I could write about that would please more readers -- whoa -- that is a big loud no!

A painter cannot paint well if he's thinking about what other painters do and why they're famous. An actor at an audition has to focus on the who-what-when-where-why of the part he's playing, not beating out the other actors waiting their turn, not winning the part, or impressing the director.

In writing, I have to stay focused on what I'm feeling about things that are going on in the world -- not my personal, private successes/failures in my former-career- world, the dance world -- the real world.

It's not weird -- that I need to avoid show biz things -- that I have keep away from my performer self. What makes my writing exciting and important to me is what I manage to convey.

So this post about why Em avoids awards shows -- apply it to yourself.

What is the work of your work? Does the evening you spend watching the movie and music stars leave you peppy, or does it make the work you have to do tomorrow seem unimportant, ho-hum, tedious?

If it inspires you -- each year there are more and more award shows turning people you never heard of into somebody in the limelight -- do something marvelous, outrageous, uniquely special and next year it could be you!