IMMIGRATION

Once upon a time, the most beautiful land in the world chose a good-looking, young, brown hero, a Dem to rule the land and live in the White Palace.

They called him "Boss." The Boss has to follow the constitution made by the very old, very first ruling gang who founded the land. The Boss has a lot of work to do to fix the economy, wars, unemployment, and a real-estate crisis, and things can't be fixed without a bunch of new rules.

Rules have to be okayed by the new gang -- Reps and Dems, whites and browns, mostly rich people who have plenty of time to work on the rules. They were chosen by the folks who lived in the big cities, one-horse towns, farms, beaches, and no-name, no-where-everywhere places on the map.

The folks loved the new boss. The Reps didn't. They didn't want things changed, but the Dems knew if some of the rules didn't change, folks were going to go hungry and have to sell their houses and cars, and not send their kids to college.

So every time the Boss tried to change the rules, the Reps in the gang said, "No siree, Bob," while the Dems got sweaty nervous, and comforted each other, figuring they'd change the rules later.

Even so, the Boss fixed quite a lot of things because a "boss" has power. Being a convincer type of guy, by golly, he convinced some Reps NOT to say, "No siree, Bob." And of course, he had the pen every boss of the land gets to have, in order to mark the X on the paper that makes a new rule work.

He got some of the failing car and housing businesses working again with a whopping amount of money in an Economic Stimulus plan. And that meant jobs for some of the folks who were hungry, selling things, spending money they didn't have.

He negotiated and got a huge tax cut, the biggest tax cut that was ever made for the folks who weren't rich; got Credit Card reform, and Student Loan reform, so young people could go to college and eventually pay back what they'd borrowed for tuition.

The Boss also got more civil rights -- fair and equal pay for women; also a Hate Crimes act; also Wall Street reform -- new rules about money that the land desperately needed so it wouldn't go broke again in a couple of years.

Despite the "No siree Bob-ers," the Boss, a talented wheeler-dealer, got unemployment insurance extended. And because the Boss went to international meetings, he cooked-up "don't make or sell nuclear weapons" deals with the Russians and a bunch of other countries who were worried about terrorism.

What surprised the Reps -- really pissed them off -- what they couldn't stand was the fact that he got a Health Care reform bill passed.

Yes, and Boss made a good deal with BP, the oil guys. They're paying for fixing up the land that's been ruined by BP's oil spill.

All this, while the pissed-off Reps have been spending $3 million bucks a week on advertisements putting down every single thing on the Boss's agenda.

But wow, just the other day, the Boss got $600 million for the land's immigration problem -- border security -- 1,500 new enforcers and drones along the borders of the southwestern states. Also, last-minute, before the Dems and Reps disappeared for vacation, he got $26 billion for various states who are out of money, to help them pay for teachers and emergency workers.

Well, the Reps are furious. They want to change the constitution -- it has some old-fashioned things in it that they're desperate to change -- especially NO more automatic citizenship for brown, half-breed babies.

The Reps are working night and day, raising money for the big election day two years from now. They want a white Rep in the White Palace -- the browns, according to the census, are going to be majority soon.

The question is "when." White women are having fewer children. The Latino browns are having nine brown babies for every one death, compared with a roughly one-to-one ratio for whites.

Yes, the Reps are seriously frantic, and the Dems are definitely sweaty nervous. Is this fairy tale going to have us and the brown Boss living happily ever after, or a new, pale face Rep moving into the White Palace?