Saturday, July 2, 2011


When I saw him play tennis, I was bowled over. He was exciting and confident and a winner as an actor, and it never occurred to me that this same 'star" quality would be evident on a tennis court.

I wish we'd developed a way to share tennis, but I couldn't handle backhand, and never really could absorb the "choreography" involved with serving. Nowadays, we watch all the major tournaments, with me delighted to be watching John, and listening to his running comments on the players , and the progression of each game.

I've asked him, more than once, how he would describe himself as a tennis player. He said, "I was a very good tennis player, tournament level."

Thursday, June 30, 2011


Realities are settling in -- a lot of people feel country is on the wrong track. There's sadness and frustration, an inchoate rage more profound than the sign-waving political fury we saw during the elections last fall.

Newsweek Beast polled 600 people and informed us that three out of four believe the economy is stagnant or getting worse. One in three is uneasy about getting married, starting a family, or being able to buy a home. Most say their relationships have been damaged by economic woes or the dread and nervousness that accompany them.

The poll asked: Are you anxious because of your economic situation? -- 49 % say no. How upset are you by the price of gas and other commodities? -- 89% upset. Are you nervous about your retirement? -- 70% say yes. Have you lost sleep because of your anger about the economic situation? -- 56 % said yes.

I don't like polls, don't trust them or the percentage numbers. Too much depends on the tone of the questions and the conclusions the poll takers are hoping to get. But I am wondering if the days of rage we've already seen overseas might happen here?

In Spain, protesters recently clashed with police in a violent demonstration against economic woes and austerity measures. Riots have swept the Arab world, exploding out of unemployment and people wanting a better life. Nearly one in five American men between 25 and 54 is without a job right now, while Wall street and the corporations that probably caused the economy to tank, are back, confidently paying executives huge salaries with bonuses.

It bothers me that big banks, and car manufacturers are back to doing what they did before -- like car manufacturers, bragging about the great mileage new cars get. It's s the same M.P H. their cars got 5 years ago. (I remember the ads 5 years ago, when we were helping our son buy a new car.)

And I can't forget what happened in Wisconsin this past winter -- is it a where we are heading? Thousands of protesters (25,000 some say) commandeered the capital building, revolting against attempted curbs on union power.

I'm remembering faces, fury, greed, violence, a mish-mash from movies, photos, a disordered jumble from long ago, from yesterday, other yesterdays -- gay pride marches, pro and anti integration crazies fighting, madness at the Chicago convention, riots at concerts, Los Angeles burning, fists breaking store windows, raggedy guys stealing TVs, New York's blackout with angry folks cursing, throwing bottles, chairs, stones, and last year's crop of kooks with guns.

I think the rebellion can happen here. The wall of accumulated frustrations is already shutting out light and air, There's a new morality in the new generation that's been, bottle-fed on rage and violence, and the terrified despairing seniors follow them as if they're juniors,

I wish I could hide but I'm don't know where the hiding places are anymore, so I use words to protect me and tell me this will pass. We were in Los Angeles when the rioters were burning the city, and the streets were exquisitely quiet, empty, almost too quiet. We were fearful when we saw the sky was red, but relieved when nothing happened -- the madness didn't touch us.

Is that what I'm hoping for? A place to hide? Golly, I don't want to find myself following the kids. Maybe if I pour out a lot of words that others read, and nod over, it might filter into the ears of our new leaders, new pace-setters, the kids ...

Tuesday, June 28, 2011


Is she a monster, sociopath, or psychopath?

It is difficult to ignore the revelations and NOT feel sorry for Casey's Mom, who seems so deaf, so blind about her daughter's lies. And the father -- despite what Casey said about him abusing her, her father and mother continue to support what appears to be their daughter's fairytale fiction.

It certainly seems to be a story about a 25-year-old woman who didn't want to be a Mother, and got rid of the child.

The trial is hypnotizing. Are we dealing with Casey A. being put to death? I doubt it. She's young, average-ordinary-nice-looking.

Are we dealing with life imprisonment? I think so. I can't imagine that she will not be spending the rest of her life in prison.

Could she, instead of prison, be sent to a prison hospital?

Yes. I think we'd be paying for her parents inability to raise their daughter with a sense of right and wrong. Is she insane? Mentally ill? How does her crime relate to the horror story of Andrea Yates, in jail for life, for drowning her five children?

Casey A. is our current O.J. soap opera. Lawyers lawyering got him a Not Guilty verdict. Now he's in jail, not playing golf, not gallivanting around with various girlfriends, but the sense that we, society and the law failed, is still in the air. With testimony about the odor of death that was in Casey's car, chloroform research on her computer, duct tape on the decomposed corpse, I can't conceive of Casey A . being deemed NOT GUILTY, but ... well, it could happen.

It's the biggest show we've got right now. More interesting than Weiner's weenie and will his wife divorce him, more interesting than Romney, or any of the Repubs except Palin, who is cuter, sexier, more outspoken but capable of riveting us with her singing out some strong conviction that gets her headlines and gets our hackles up.

Yes, the Casey A. trial is a compelling diversion from poll numbers, statistics, doomful facts showing us that the economy is still failing, that more and more Americans are being endangered by the inability of Congress and the President to keep the country running. He can't move because they won't move -- it's still just talk-talk about a debt-ceiling, trying to fix what eight years of Bush/Cheney did.

(The time that's being wasted in our House of Representatives ... it's as if the faucets are open -- all of them open and running water full blast.. Will we run out of water to drink, to clean ourselves with, and have no water for nourishing crops, growing green things, and putting out fires? Will we become one of the countries where people wash in and drink unclean water?)

I am going upstairs and turning on the TV to watch the Nancy Grace style bitter, practical, commentary on Casey A. and continue to be repelled -- shocked by what happened to her two-year old daughter, rather than contemplate what would happen if Obama decided NOT to run for a second term -- not run because he knows that much of the hatred and anti-everything that he tries to do, is because he's Black? Oh no! Well ... maybe yes.

Watching the trial is less painful.

Sunday, June 26, 2011


What new project should we take on? We've been producers, raising money, casting my plays, "One Fine Morning." "Zinnia," "People in Show Biz Make Long Goodbyes," "Shattering Panes." And of course, as producers, we worked on creating sets, costumes, lighting, costumes and the very big deal of "selling tickets."

"Panes" was project I started working on more than 20 years ago, with John, John David (our son), and me playing ourselves. It has been THE current project until last year. For various reasons, having to do with other current commitments, it is shelved for the time being. (John is mulling over "Bible Ballads," and my seven novels are in the process of being published as e-books.)

What else can we do? I suggest we learn Spanish. Will we take that on? Though the most fun has always been working on a play, the seed it planted.